bday without you

im going to celebrate my 25th birthday tomorrow ate but lawrence and i dont know how to celebrate it without you. do you like the roses? we bought them from the flower shop. the confetti props well that's my idea. hope you like them too. today is sunday and we havent been to church. we woke up very late but were going to visit ina this afternoon. mom and papa are okay. mom told me i should stop crying because its bad but i just cant stop my tears from falling. do you have any idea how? i know its weird and i shouldnt ask you like this but this is my avenue to lighten up. hope you understand me. im not used to it. i have my card back ive been really good lately. i told mom im quiting school and she said its ok but i promised her to make my MS soon. I just cant comply to the university lately i am too much busy with everything that i have to miss the online class. i lost another havaianas ate. i dont know how but the last time i saw the slippers was when we're celebrating your 4oth day. my things are easily gone and papa told me not to look for them anymore we can buy another one soon. i dont know if we can afford to have the wifi back papa decided to limit the internet speed to 1mbps and i cant even play the mafia this time. we're on a tight budget lately. i ask them why they told me things are not going the way they used to be so were not spending too much for nonsense this time. but im still receiving my monthly subsidy and since i dont have the powers for my savings account lately havent touched them for quite long. well tomorrow we dont have any plans yet. but today a box of pizza, a bottle of coke and spaghetti and sundae will do. with regards to the big kuya's and big ate's well they are on tight monitoring of me. i will visit you more often.